Poor Manners

"Hospitality involves you offering something to me but the reciprocle is just as important. The nature in which I take it and appreciate it is equally important in that equation and we are very bad at that part." - Alton Brown

Today I was thinking about how I could be a vegetarian without pissing off the people who feed me.

Vegetarians and vegans generally receive poor or naive reception from their omnivorous neighbors. It seems like many veggies feel like this is an affront on their lifestyle. People poke fun of them because they are not apart of normal American culture, and some feel that they are a pain in the ass because of all the work they have to do to appease them and their special needs. It's a common opinion an inconsiderate attitude toward people who don't fit it, and I really do understand why people get angsty about it.

Dinosaurs are hilarious, but seem jealous they can't have a support group because of their extinction.

On the other hand, I can't tell you how many vegetarians I have heard of turning away food offered to them because of their diet. Understandably you wouldn't take a gun someone gave you and fire it into the nearest living thing to appease them, but there comes a point where you start abusing your values system and become greedy. Not everyone is going to have a Boca burger on hand at every BBQ, or an egg-less cake at a wedding. This is where I feel a lot of the rude vegetarian stereotypes stem from. Refusal to buy meat products is one thing, refusal to eat the fried chicken your grandmother is cooking unless she makes a cruelty free side dish for you is another.

As Alton Brown describes in his quote about hospitality, it's not just about taking what someone gives to you, it's the act of receiving that we've forgotten. It's too easy for us now to go to a friend's house and scoff at the meatloaf Jim's mom made for the family; completely disregarding the fact that the same family is letting you eat at their table. When it comes down to it, we as an entire culture are incredibly spoiled. Hospitality has become a catch phrase that we use to impress our peers rather than an act we share with our fellow man. It's gone out of style to eat something that we didn't like or approve of, so a free meal is wasted upon mouths that talk more about what they eat than chew.

This is why, no matter how passionate I become about this cause, I refuse to deny a free meal from anyone.

To some of you I'm sure this sounds like a cop out. What if someone offers me veal with a side of gravy laden mashed potatoes, would it be ethical of me to eat it? Well honestly I don't think the person offering is trying to attack your morals by feeding you a steak. To a typical American that is fine dining, and I would eat it if they were charitable enough to just give it away to me. Of course I could only eat the mashed potatoes, trying desperately to avoid the gravy and veal, but it's as if to say, "Oh thank you for the meal, I'll pretend to eat some of it to appease you." No I will bite into any meal that someone provides me, because regardless of what I think they are feeding me.

Personally I still believe that eating meat should be avoided, but also believe people should have some common sense. Cause less suffering to your friend, who spent time and money getting you something and eat it. Even better, offer to make them something in return! Then you can go on and on about your opinions about eating meat as they scarf down the awesome hummus you made with your time and money. They will probably be a lot more willing to listen to you than if you had pushed their plate away, folded your arms and listed all the reasons why the stuff on that dish was wrong.

Thank you for the meal last night Bob, but this is why I eat meat substitutes.

Now I know someone is probably going to make me dinner ladened with arsenic just to spite me, but we shouldn't ignore what our fellow man provides us. You can argue that people who eat meat are ignorant of its cruelty, you can argue that vegetarianism is the ultimate ease of suffering, you can yell from the highest rooftop until meat eater in the city knows how horrible they are to the world; just don't expect anyone to cook for you next time you come over.